Mercedes Madness

The Mercedes that arrived to much excitement has very quickly lost it’s shine.

We’d had it all of 6 days when I inserted the key into the ignition and nothing happened, not even das wimperus autøfårten.

I Checked all the fuses located in the 3 different locations, the battery under the seat and even the made sure all the bulbs were working as well as all the relays but to no avail.

So being of the slightly geeky variety I set about pleading for help on the various Mercedes user groups and came across a couple of lads in the UK whom, it would seem, have forgotten more about Mercs than most mechanics will learn in a lifetime. They suggested I try cleaning the lens on the key because the infrared bit becomes dirty over time as well as the ignition unit. Still nothing, so they then told me to check yet another fuse in the air-conditioning unit that uses a fan to cool the processors in the engine management unit (ECU) but still nothing happening.

The eventual prognosis was that he Electronic Ignition System (EIS) was faulty. I had to call the Grua (tow truck) to take it the garage where it eventually ended up at a Mercedes main dealer. Now, I’m not a wealthy guy and I cringed when I enquired about their hourly rate. It was pretty healthy but the up side was the guy’s I had been online with said that the EIS is a well known problem on that model and the dealer should fix it pretty quickly without too much hassle.

What they didn’t know was that Spanish Mercedes dealers have not gone through the same revolutionary training that UK dealers experience and instead of being say, 500 Euros to fix the problem it ended up being 1200…..Ouch.

It wasn’t just a new ignition. Oh no, it was also a new steering lock and a key because all the components “communicate” with each other and our version can’t be reprogrammed, all new components are required. The key alone was 168 Euros and that didn’t include the little metal emergency key which slots into the back. The one we already have doesn’t fit because Mercedes have redesigned the key so we are expected to fork out another 28 euros for the little metal emergency key. That makes the total cost of a key 196 Euros.

Now, I get to see some pretty advanced electronics on a daily basis but I have never, repeat never seen anything quite so ridiculous as the ignition on our car. Look at the pictures and you have to think to yourself all that is simply to switch on the car. Whatever happened to good old fashioned lock tumblers and a couple of wires?

Serves us right for owning a Merc I guess and it has been shall we say an interesting experience. I don’t think I’ll ever be in a hurry to own one again let’s put it that way.